That Giant Sucking Sound

Ross Perot was one of the more colorful and entertaining Presidential Candidates in a long line of those coming out of Texas in recent memory.  He was a short little thing with a big, loud Texas-sized voice, complete with a nasally twang.  One of his favorite themes on the campaign trail was NAFTA.  He always said in that loud twang of his, “That giant sucking sound you will hear will be American jobs heading south to Mexico!”  At least something to that effect, I am going from memory here.  That phrase came to mind this past weekend when I heard that both Michelle Bachmann and Sarah Palin would be in Iowa this week.  “That giant sucking sound” is the intelligence being drained right out of every living thing in Iowa capable of putting together a coherent thought.  As those two create a Right-wing-Science-be-damned, Dinosaurs-and-people-walked-the-earth-together, Civil-liberty-denying, No-healthcare-for-you, Kill-Planned-Parenthood, Screw-up-Social, Security, Medicare, and Medicaid, Blast-education-back-to-the-nineteenth-century vortex.  I think President Obama might need to send FEMA into Iowa after the twin F5s of Palin-Bachmann have left the state to recover any of the survivors and relocate them to some place safe, like Vermont.  Ow!  After typing Palin-Bachmann I realized that could be a Republican ticket.  Perish the thought.  Talk about America losing credibility on the world stage.    

I heard there was a gay moment on the Glen Beck show between he and Rick Santorum. (Did you just go back and re-read that last sentence?)  Beck asked Santorum about yet another pledge (What is it about all of these pledges?  There is only one pledge I am concerned about my President upholding, and that is the Oath of Office) Sorry, back on point… Beck asked him about the “Cut Cap Balance Pledge” and Santorum enthusiastically announced he had already signed it!  Beck then said, “I could kiss you in the mouth!”  Can you say…Awkward!?  This was especially awkward, given Santorum’s past with gay issues.  Here’s the video.  Anyway, I had to laugh. 

OK, get ready, I’m about to compliment Our Governor of the Unnaturally Wide Shoulders.  Really!  Last week he signed a bill forcing drilling companies to disclose what chemicals they use when drill for natural gas in shale, know as Hydraulic Fracturing or Fracking.  To paraphrase Vice-President Biden, “This is a big fracking deal,” and I cannot believe this Governor, or in fact, any Governor of Texas would sign such Legislation into Law.  It is feared that the drilling companies are using very harmful chemicals at very high rates to get to the gas, and that those chemicals are ending up in ground water supplies.  So, thank you, Governor Perry, you did a good thing.  

Now, back to more familiar territory.  Thankfully, the Sanctuary Cities Bill seems to be going nowhere in this special session of the Legislature, which ends this Wednesday.  The house had a problem with coming up with a quorum this past week, which kept them from voting on it.  Thank you Representative Larry Taylor, leader of the Republican Caucus, for taking your family on vacation to the Bahamas while the special session was in progress I think you really helped out, well you, and all those lobbyists hired by all those businessmen that depend on immigrant labor.  However, what the Senate and House have passed is a big-ass bill that among other things, further defunds Planned Parenthood, other family planning clinics, and even Hospital Districts that provide abortions.  Surely, this must be Unconstitutional.  I fear for the women of this state.  I can only hope that the voters will come to their senses and replace these backwards thinking politicians that are always trying to impose their religious dogma on everyone else.  My parents raised me to believe in God, but not to foist my beliefs on other people. Carry your religion firmly, yet quietly, is what I learned from them.  Too bad most of our elected officials didn’t know my parents.